12 Bad Marketing Tips (by the Marketing Monsters)

November 24, 2021

When it comes to marketing for your business, monsters aren't the best advice-givers. In fact, their insights are quite terrible! When our monster-handling team at 5Points Creative heard about the Marketing Monster's "12 Holiday Marketing Mayhem Tips", we had to intervene (Don't worry, they're already on our naughty list). In this newsletter, we'll address each Marketing Monster's senseless seasonal suggestion with what you really need to know about marketing. 

1.  Prospects Love Cold and Impersonal Communication

If Curfuzzler, the bad communication monster, had it his way, all communication would be cold and impersonal, leaving your target audience…well, curfuzzled. 

Creating festive and memorable communication starts with placing your target audience at the center of your messaging. Take the time to research and understand your customers' pain points. Consider their interests when creating personalized messaging, ya dig? Because at the end of the day, you're sending messages to a person. 

 2.  Keep Customers Entertained with Redundant Steps and Blockers 

Markler, the bad marketing monster, is notorious for sending customers through duplicate steps, complicated processes, and spoiling their purchasing experience. 

Removing barriers in the path to purchase that your customers takes increases conversions and leaves a memorable experience. Start with customer journey mapping to understand and monitor each touchpoint. Identifying areas of friction in a customer's journey is crucial to find and fix immediately. 

 3.  Tracking Marketing Results is Overrated

Conversion pixels, traffic sources, open rates, event tracking...who needs it?! Digi, the bad digital marketing monster, thinks no one.

Taking the time to set up proper tracking, tagging, and reporting gives you and your team a clear view into what's working and where you need to pivot. While not all marketing technology speaks the same language, the more you can connect your systems, the cleaner the data will be to help you quickly identify results. Tracking is not overrated – it's essential for your business's success.

4.  Keep Your Branding Interesting by Using Many Logo Variations

Brandon, the bad branding monster, thinks the more logo variations you have, the better.Keep prospects guessing; that's the fun stuff. 

While consistency is key, it's just as important to create branding that connects you to your customers and prospects. Beyond color section, font libraries, and logo marks, there is work to be done to home in on what will resonate most with your audience. Let's not keep them guessing; let’s keep them remembering. 

 5.  WebsiteOptimization is Not Needed to Rank

SERP what? Keyword strategy? Meta huh? Skip all of that and just create a website for...you, says Digit.

We all want to rank number one in search results for our most important keywords. Yes, that sweet victory of winning the number one spot organically and without ad dollars. It feels good. 

It also takes time and patience. Website optimization is a long play that takes constant work. Beyond identifying the best ways to improve SEO, you must also consider how are visitors experiencing your content? In other words, don't always solve just for the search engine, consider how a visitor consumes your content.

 6.  Wing Content Creation, No One Will Know

Create content, and they will come, right? Post about yourself often on social media. Why make it about the user? Digit says yes to all of the above.

The truth is, content creation can be powerful if done correctly. We've said it before, and we'll say it again: place your audience at the center of any content you want to create. What are their pain points? Common questions? Interests? How does your business help? Starting with a strategy for your content can be the best blueprint to execute and reach your audience.

7.  A Website Is Good for 5+ Years

It's the investment that keeps on giving, even after the content is old and theUI/UX is outdated. Visitors will get used to it, so why make improvements? Digit sure does have a unique perspective on websites.

 Even if your products and services do not vary much, technology constantly changes. From web browsers to cookie tracking, the way we use technology changes almost daily. While you may still like the website you had built a few years ago, it could be causing more harm than good to your key performance indicators (KPIs). If you're not making regular improvements to your website over time (after all, once you launch a website, it's just the beginning of tweaking), you could be missing valuable connections with visitors. 

8.  Don't Define a Target Audience

The bigger the audience, the better! If Adders, the bad advertising monster, could serve ads to every internet user, he would.

Depending on your end goal with advertising, serving the right message, to the right audience, at the right time constitutes the bulk of the ingredients to get right in the recipe of success. Often, building out multiple campaigns targeting very defined groups of audiences with specific messages can grow KPIs tremendously, while building awareness-specific campaigns is a different strategy. Taking the time to define whom you want to reach is a great place to start building out a strong ad campaign. 

9.  Stop Scheduling and Planning Your Marketing

You're wasting time if you plan out your marketing campaigns and content calendars. Markler says it's a lot of work for little return. Wing it; you'll keep your audience in suspense (or confused).

We've all been there. Time ticks faster when there's a big campaign to be built or the quarter is running out, and you need content ready to go for the next one. The truth is taking the time to strategize and plan out your marketing in advance isn't one and done. It gives you a guide to tweak as needed and gives your team the ability to work at their best.

10. Place Media According to Your Personal Taste

Adders only picks his favorite shows to run commercials (like the Extended Documentary of How Algae Forms). If he sees the commercial, surely everyone else does too?

Placement of your advertising is just as important as timing. While there are a lot of great shows on TV, they may not be the best fit for your budget or goal. Take the time to plan out your advertising to reach the best audience at a cost-effective price.

11. Building Media Relationships Is a Waste of Time

You have better things to do than build relationships with the media. Besides, shouldn't they be making all of their time available for you? Adders thinks so.

Relationships can open up doors, but in this case, they open up channels that would be beneficial to your marketing goals. Connecting and speaking with media providers regularly is a good way to keep them up-to-date on your goals and priorities for your marketing. Many times, the best media buys are available because of those relationships and regular conversations. 

12. Blast Your Contact List with Emails Every Day

If they are a contact in the CRM, they are getting an email! That's how Digit rolls.

Like most marketing channels, if not used properly, email marketing can quickly fall numb to your contacts and, even worse, put you on spam lists. Before pressing send on any email, ask these questions:

What's the purpose of this email?

Why should the recipient care?

What action would we like them to take?

 

5Points Creative is a full-service marketing and advertising firm based in Roanoke, VA. Our team of professionals provides marketing, advertising, digital, branding, and communication to those with a story to tell.

Learn More

back to the B2Seed
arrow icon